There are three shopping days until Christmas. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
1. Diamonds are a girl's best friend. But if she has cataracts then cubic zirconia is a lovely acquaintance
2. Sex is a risky gift for Christmas. If it is good then you lucked out. But if it is bad then you can't return it and you will remember it for a lifetime. Also, waking up pregnant is normally something ladies want to do since there is alot of drinking to be had on New Years Eve
3. Don't be afraid to be stereotypical. Some women love pots, pans and other kitchen stuff. This might be the time to get that new stove she will be slaving over next year.
4. When buy a gift for men, it is fairly simple. But don't assume cologne or a tie will do it. A wife dressed in a sexy maid outfit is practical for any holiday. You can even get more festive by dressing up as naughty Mrs Clause
5. If you are buying a car for that special someone, make sure you buy a car that has good fuel efficiency. Those 6 mile/gallon Hummers don't really cut it.
6. Some people get flowers. If you buy flowers don't buy the ones that are cut already. Just like you Christmas tree or a crappy marraige, it will die. Buy something exotic that is in a pot and take care of it as a bonding thing. (Holy shit, this one is actually a good idea)
7. Buy your dude a flat screen TV. Its almost time for the superbowl and its good to watch the game on a giant TV while you are making him and his friend nachos on your new stove.
8. When shopping for kids, just take them with you to buy thier gift. The brats know what they want. If you are one of those people that like to buy you child's gift 2 months early, see if it is still something they want. Also, stop buying your kid's gift 2 months early.
9. Canada
10. Gift cards are a lovely present at someone's favorite story. They want the money instead though. They need flexibility and your thoughtfullness is kinda stupid.
Have a nice Christmas people
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment