TGI Friday....But Oh Noes, its the 13th

Well guys, its Friday again. You know what that means. It is once again time for the weekly blood sacrifices. I have been banned from the orphanages here though. The government is starting to catch on to me. Well, I guess my next stop is prison and this time, I won't be an inmate.

So this whole Friday the 13th things is fairly interesting. So to celebrate, I am going to talk about a few weird phobias I have heard of.

1. Fear of Pickles
I know there are alot of people out thier that don't like pickles, but I think they are delicious. They're crunchy, salty and make food taste alot better. This is just my opinion though. But there are people out there that have developed an irrational fear of them. I have no idea why people would be afraid of something that doesn't even move, but it happens. Maybe they really fear phallic objects? In any event, they should strive to conquer this fear or I am going to put them on Jupiter. Not Neptune though. Fuck Neptune.

2. Anatadiaphobia
Fear of ducks. Okay really now? Ducks aren't dangerous. Unless it's that Aflac duck. The US government didn't believe me when I told them he was a spy. I have two words for them - Soviet Union. I didn't act alone that day. I had help from an evil mastermind. He was also the one that brain washed my good friend James Harper into doint the KT extinction that destroyed the dinosaurs.

3. Fear of Gravity turning off.
It's been here ever since Isaac Newton invented it and so long as the world leaders keep doing what I say it'll stay here.

4. Phobophobia
I smell irony and redundancy and redundacy. This is a fear of developing a fear. There should be one thing you fear though - See that moon thing in the sky? It's getting closer.

Well, there you have it. A few wierd phobias that I have heard about. While there are many more I am currently unable to talk about them. I am actually busy trying to get out of Iran right now. Some guy just blew up the power station and my computer is about to die. No to mention all this bullets that keep hitting me. Well, I'm off to get several blood transfusions and undergo major surgery in a back alley.

100, 99, 98, 97........